The O-Files

Mostly So My Mom Knows I'm Not Dead.

2009-10-10T20:29:00.007-05:00

So it's been about a year since I've posted here. Yes, I've been busy, but that's no excuse. The good news is that some of that "busy" has been spent on herping and photography, and I've been able to add a modest number (10 to be exact) of species to the life list. I will provide a fully updated list in a later post, but but thought I might leave you with a photo essay (of sorts) of the additions.

Here they are, in order of appearance.

Plethodon dorsalis /Zig-Zag Salamander (Indiana)

Plethodon electromorphus /Ravine Salamander (Ohio)

Hemidactylium scutatum /Four-toed Salamander (Ohio)

Trachemys scripta elegans /Red-eared Slider (Ohio)

Nerodia sipedon pleuralis /Midland Water Snake (Illinois)

Bufo americanus charlessmithi /Dwarf American Toad (Illinois)

Pantherophis (Elaphe) obsoletus /Black Rat Snake (Illinois)

Lampropeltis c. calligaster /Prairie King Snake (Illinois)

Eumeces fasciatus /Five-lined Skink (Illinois)

Pantherophis (Elaphe) vulpinus /Eastern Fox Snake (Ohio)

Not a huge haul of new stuff, but some of those (such as the skink, the Black Rat Snake, and the Fox Snake) were long overdue. Sort of like this post . . .

Photo Update

2008-11-17T20:28:00.004-05:00

All were taken on my new camera, a Canon Powershot A720 IS. Click on the photos below for the unobstructed version.

I think the biggest way my new camera has improved my picture taking has little to do with the camera itself. In researching cameras and, especially, reading the manual for my new Powershot, I have learned alot about photography in general, and playing with the manual and semi-manual settings has helped me understand how each affects the resulting image.

Yeah, I might be the next Ansel Adams. We'll see.

Follow Your Heart, Not the Law?

2008-10-28T08:28:00.004-05:00

One of the most lasting impressions any president makes on our nation is made indirectly. I am talking about the judges he (perhaps someday, she) appoints to the Federal Court system. While policy direction and decision making changes with each administration, and laws enacted can be altered or repealed, judges can, if they wish, serve for life. Because their decisions become the basis for future decisions (this is called "precedent"), the ideology of a judge can impact decisions directly for decades, and, indirectly for literally centuries.

Many, myself included, believe that while the Constitution can demonstrate flexibility by being applied to a nearly infinite number of situations, the principles themselves within the Constitution are essentially unchanging, and ought to be construed to mean what they meant to the founders. Words mean what words mean. This is called "constructionism".

Senator Barack Obama, however, sees things a bit differently, as this article points out.

Speaking in July 2007 at a conference of Planned Parenthood, he said: "[W]e need somebody who's got the heart, the empathy, to recognize what it's like to be a young teenage mom. The empathy to understand what it's like to be poor, or African-American, or gay, or disabled, or old. And that's the criteria by which I'm going to be selecting my judges."

On this view, plaintiffs should usually win against defendants in civil cases; criminals in cases against the police; consumers, employees and stockholders in suits brought against corporations; and citizens in suits brought against the government. Empathy, not justice, ought to be the mission of the federal courts, and the redistribution of wealth should be their mantra.

If elected, Barack Obama will have the responsibility of nominating up to 6 Supreme Court Justices and many, many more judges to lower courts. This is one more arena in which a vote for Obama is a vote for pragmatism over principle.

Don't Faint, Pray!

2008-10-25T11:16:00.004-05:00

Hey Folks,

I thought it would be appropriate after the last two "downer" posts to kind of give you "the rest of the story". It was, in fact the day that I linked the article below on Sen. Obama's (Dem., IL) positions on abortion, that I was immediately reminded of the prayer of Nehemiah. I have prayed it several time since, and quote it below for your encouragement.

And they said to me, “The remnant there in the province who had survived the exile is in great trouble and shame. The wall of Jerusalem is broken down, and its gates are destroyed by fire.” As soon as I heard these words I sat down and wept and mourned for days, and I continued fasting and praying before the God of heaven. And I said, “O Lord God of heaven, the great and awesome God who keeps covenant and steadfast love with those who love him and keep his commandments, let your ear be attentive and your eyes open, to hear the prayer of your servant that I now pray before you day and night for the people of Israel your servants, confessing the sins of the people of Israel, which we have sinned against you. Even I and my father's house have sinned. We have acted very corruptly against you and have not kept the commandments, the statutes, and the rules that you commanded your servant Moses. Remember the word that you commanded your servant Moses, saying, ‘If you are unfaithful, I will scatter you among the peoples, but if you return to me and keep my commandments and do them, though your outcasts are in the uttermost parts of heaven, from there I will gather them and bring them to the place that I have chosen, to make my name dwell there.’ They are your servants and your people, whom you have redeemed by your great power and by your strong hand. O Lord, let your ear be attentive to the prayer of your servant, and to the prayer of your servants who delight to fear your name, and give success to your servant today, and grant him mercy in the sight of [the king].”

Nehemiah 1:3-11a (ESV)

Obama's Tax Cut: Just Words.

2008-10-17T07:06:00.005-05:00

You may recall one particularly impassioned speech (some of which was borrowed, with permission) Senator Barack Obama gave during the democratic primary race, decrying the claims of Senator Clinton's campaign that Senator Obama was merely a gifted speaker who had little more than words to offer. Here's a snippet.

Don't tell me words don't matter. 'I have a dream' -- just words. 'We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal' -- just words. 'We have nothing to fear but fear itself' - just words. Just speeches.

Sounds good, right? But Senator Obama's true regard for words and their meaning are exposed in this article by Phillip Klein.

[Senator] Obama is getting away with defining tax cuts so broadly, that future candidates will simply claim any form of increased government spending as a tax cut. Under Obama's logic, higher food stamp allowances and expanded state funding of the arts could be dubbed "food tax credit" and "arts tax credit" respectively, and also qualify.

Senator Obama's usage doesn't merely reduce the term "tax cut" to just words; it reduces it to words devoid of any meaning whatsoever.

P.S. And Philip Klein gets an A+ in journalistic questioning.

Hitler Only Killed 6 Million Jews

2008-10-15T13:24:00.003-05:00

The United States of America allows the murder of over 1 million unborn babies every year, about 40 million since 1973.

For Senator Barack Obama, that number isn't quite high enough.

In an act of breathtaking injustice which the Obama campaign lied about until critics produced documentary proof of what he had done, as an Illinois state senator Obama opposed legislation to protect children who are born alive, either as a result of an abortionist's unsuccessful effort to kill them in the womb, or by the deliberate delivery of the baby prior to viability. This legislation would not have banned any abortions. Indeed, it included a specific provision ensuring that it did not affect abortion laws. (This is one of the points Obama and his campaign lied about until they were caught.) The federal version of the bill passed unanimously in the United States Senate, winning the support of such ardent advocates of legal abortion as John Kerry and Barbara Boxer. But Barack Obama opposed it and worked to defeat it. For him, a child marked for abortion gets no protection-even ordinary medical or comfort care-even if she is born alive and entirely separated from her mother. So Obama has favored protecting what is literally a form of infanticide.

God have mercy on our nation.

Don't Take My Powershot Away

2008-08-30T14:00:00.007-05:00

Cuz you can clearly see what I'm capable of doing with it (click on all pics in this post for a higher resolution image).

Actually, the photo above was taken on my old HP 733 Photosmart camera. The Canon Powershot A720 IS (or perhaps the A650 IS) is the camera with which I hope to replace what has become a barely serviceable dinosaur. While we've been able to capture plenty of memories (and more than a few herpetological records) with it, it does have it's drawbacks. For starters, it has 3.1 megapixels, which used to be a fair amount, but, as with all things kilo, mega, and giga, has been left in the dust. It also has only 3x optical zoom; I would like more. But the main reasons I am looking at new cameras are more related to quality issues than cutting edge features.

The picture below illustrates one of the reasons I am moving on. As you can see, the average quality of candid shots in full point and shoot mode on the HP 733 is, well, below average. This was the best of several shots, and its still only ok. By the way, this is what became of the cantelope above. Ella nearly put a hole in the countertop eating hers.

And while taking the shot above, the other two big quality problems with my current cam manifested themselves. For some reason when I take a picture, the 733 can take several seconds writing it to the memory card-- occassionally it never does "take". This can cause me no end of frustration when taking several pictures in short succession. Also, my battery ran out. This camera gets about 75 shots per set of batteries. Irritating.

While looking for a new camera, I have actually learned quite a bit about photography. I am now fairly knowledgeable on such subjects as f-stop, ISO "speed", shutter speed, white balance, etc. The two pictures below made use of my new found knowledge, again, on the weary HP 733.

This first pic was taken at the highest ISO setting on my current cam-- 400. I was hoping to introduce a bit of distortion (noise) into the picture so that when I did a couple minor things with it in Photoshop, it would look more authentically old-fashioned. I think it worked fairly well.

This next photo was taken at my cam's highest f-stop (smallest aperature or opening), which is 4.8, in order to get a greater depth of focus (or is it field-- I still get those two mixed up). I also adjusted the white balance to compensate for the afternoon sunlight that was flooding this west-facing window.

Really, the box of crayons makes it, no?

The camera I hope to get has a much greater range of ISO settings, aperature sizes, shutters speeds and such options, as well as boasting a 6x optical zoom and a 12.1 megapixel picture size. It even has image stabilization and face recognition capabilities. Pretty soon they'll make cameras that can be your best friend!

At any rate. That's my newest deal. Hopefully the quality of my pictures reflects the investment ($ for b-day is a great idea, wink-wink), as I suspect in my Alzheimer's-riddled old age, they will be all I have for memories.

Serendipitosityness

2008-08-15T19:23:00.003-05:00

Joseph, alert child that he is, noticed an unusual feature had been added to our backyard sometime during the night.

Sadly, they were not permanent.

Salamander Project Update

2008-07-16T19:10:00.004-05:00

These things rarely turn out as I plan. Or maybe I just don't plan them well. Either way, my little projects tend to take rather curious twists or turns, and the Salamander Rearing Project: 2008 Edition was no exception. Some of you may want to read my original post on the subject, for the rest of you, I'll simply state that I collected several Ambystoma larvae from a vernal pool in my home county, and brought them home to rear them to . . . well, some point past metamorphoses anyway. My goal was to verify the continued presence of the Marbled Salamander there.

Unanticipated Problem #1: Feeding 7 larvae 10 (give or take) freeze-dried bloodworms by handheld forceps every day got old very quickly-- I had to dangle each individual worm tantalizingly in front of each little larval snout until the little guy sucked it in-- and the colony underwent, er, selective reduction after about a week. I kept the three largest and most interesting looking to see what they turn out to be.

Unanticipated Problem #2: The larvae grew a bit faster than I had calculated and were showing obvious signs of imminent metamorphosis (including gill shrinkage and tail ridge loss) shortly before I was to leave town for Myrtle Beach for a week. I ended up solving this by placing the three remaining larvae in one little water-filled sandwich container (sans lid) and placing this inside a larger plastic shoe box lined with mud and leaves. After placing a tree bark bridge from the smaller container to the floor of the larger (so each metamorph could leave the "pond" when it was ready) I put on the lid and placed it at the shadiest portion of the base of my lilac bush hoping for the best.

Fast-forward one week. We return from Myrtle Beach late, late at night. No time to check the 'manders. Next day, we went out and found the shoe box and shade had done the job as expected. Plenty of moisture had been retained and two, count them, TWO of the larvae had metamorphosized.
This was the first one to go, I believe, judging from the progress of gill resorbtion. The tape measure above is metric by the way, so the little guy was about 40 mm in total length. This is under the average length most Ambystoma larvae undergo metamorphosis, and was probably the result of the limited diet of captivity. Here is a picture of the same animal in a more natural setting.
You can kind of see the faintest remnant of the gills. Anyway, back to the story.

I took the whole contraption back to the basement to set up a juvenile habitat. While I was working all that out, the final larva "went terrestrial". I put them all in the new hab, and started looking for possible prey items to supply to them.

I ended up settling on what is either a small species of earthworm or juvenile regular earthworms. Whatever the case they looked just the right size and I supplied them to the two remaining salamanders. Yes, two. At some point one disappeared. I don't want to believe that the other two got all "Timothy" on him, but there are only so many plausible scenarios here.

I guess the salamanders agreed with my assesment of prey suitability.

By the way, it does not appear to me that either of these animals are the Marbled Salamander I was hoping for. The first one looks like a hybrid of a Blue-spotted Salamander and . . . something. The other looks like it has Jefferson's salamander genes in it. Discerning lineage in hybrids is always difficult, but as they grow it should be at least a little easier.

Anyway, now you are as up to date as I am. As always, all earth-shattering developments will be shared in . . . almost real time.

New Contact Sport

2008-07-11T21:04:00.004-05:00

Tennis. Unfortunately, the racquet should contact the ball, not someone's noggin. Ella knows this now that she watched her mother get examined for a broken nose and sewn up with 4 stitches.

It does look much better. At least she can see out of it now.

Hot Summer Herpin'

2008-07-08T21:01:00.004-05:00

Make no mistake about it, South Carolina in late June is hot. I kind of knew this before I went to Myrtle Beach. Now I really know it. It didn't help things that the first day there I got probably the worst sunburn of my life boogie boarding the 3-4 foot waves that were breaking 300 yards from the condo we were staying at. More on that later.

Anyway, I was able to take portions of three different days (for a total of about 12 hours) and go out looking for critters. The thing about herping SC this time of year is that reptiles and amphibians are temperature sensative, and many tend to be active during the cooler parts of the day or at night. Most cool parts of the day and all of the nights I was either at the condo or doing something with family.

Nevertheless, I was able to encounter some of the herp fauna. Nearly every animal I saw was a new species for me, but due to some of the situations I was unable to get pictures of many. Please enjoy those I was able to photograph.

American Alligator/Alligator mississippiensis

Northern Green Anole/Anolis c. carolinensis

Ground Skink/Scincella lateralis

Rough Green Snake/Opheodrys aestivus

The boys viewing a gator.

Six-lined Racerunner/Aspidoscels s. sexlineata

Some sort of Sand Fiddler Crab that Winfield caught.

Other animals seen that I could/did not photograph include the Banded Water Snake, Southern Black Racer, Southern Leopard Frog, and the Southern Toad-- all new to the life list as well.

At one location I went with Big Nick, we saw several interesting birds as well, including a pair of Painted Buntings. I had no idea that such colorful birds were found in North America.

That's all for now, I will try to return in short order to tell more of the family side of the trip as well as updated you all on my latest project.

Keep a sharp lookout!

Latest Project

2008-06-04T20:34:00.003-05:00

I believe the Marbled Salamander (Ambystoma opacum) to be one of most intriguing salamanders of Ohio. First of all, it is a beautiful animal; just click the link above to see for yourself. (That is a really neat site, by the way; most if not all the photos there were taken by fellow named Jason Folt.) Additionally, their life history is somewhat different from that of most other Mole (Ambystoma sp.) salamanders such as the Tiger (Ambystoma tigrinum) or Blue-spotted (Ambystoma laterale).

While these latter make their way to the breeding ponds in early Spring when they are usually quite swelled with February snow-melt and March rains, the Marbled Salamander arrives at its ponds in Autumn, when they are no more than empty depressions that have been dry since Summer. They then lay their eggs-- not too near the bottom (so they don't hatch at the first rain then dry out if no further rain arrives), and not too near the top (to avoid being just above the water line if it never rains enough to fill the pool that high)-- then wait there with them until the rain does arrive. Because of this behavior that is curiously divergent from that of like genera, it is very difficult to sample vernal pools for this particular Ambystomatid species in the typical way-- using partially-submerged minnow-trap-like-thingys around the perimiter of the pond in early Spring. Marbled Salamander adults are months gone by then.

So, in order to sample a pond for opacum effectively, you really need to dip-net said pond in spring and early summer, then check out the larvae that you find. The dip-netting part is not too hard-- I have had good success two years running now at a pond in a Hancock County, OH woods that has, historically, held Marbled Salamanders. It is the checking out larvae that I have a bit of trouble with. First off, they are kind of small and look pretty fragile. It seems that belly and throat pigmentation are key to discriminating between the different species, and these little guys just don't want to lie on their backs while I get a good enough look. I always feel like if I hold them in place long enough to see what I need to see, I am going to break a tiny leg, tear of a gill, or just plain crush them.

Therefore, the former snake room in my basement now houses a new project.

Yes, folks, we're growing baby salamanders.

Let me explain what you are seeing here. Each larva now lives in it's own little tupperware container. This makes it easier for me to keep track of how much each one eats (presently I feed them dried bloodworms one by one by hand and forceps), and keeps them from eating each other's gills off. I collected these larvae on Saturday and, until tonight, I had them all in one larger plastic tub. As of last night a couple of the little guys were already missing gills. This arrangement also allows me to track individual progress as they mature.

My hope is that one or more of these little guys grows up to be the striking creature you saw if you followed the link at the top to the photo. Admittedly, the chances at this are not great. The woods in which these were found is now much smaller than it was when the records were vouchered back in the 1960s, and the habitat is somewhat altered, so opacum may no longer persist there. Even if I don't get what I am after here, I will still end up with interesting animals. Smallmouth Salamanders (Ambystoma texanum), perhaps, or one of the several hybrids involving the Jeffersons (Ambystoma jeffersonianum) and Blue-spotted species.

OK, it's not a puppy, but who could say no to this cute little face?

Ella Can Has Boo-boo

2008-05-26T19:33:00.002-05:00

Important Bulletin!

2008-03-29T12:39:00.008-05:00

A while ago, I provided you all with a list of all the reptiles and amphibians I have seen in the field. There are a couple of problems with this list. First of all, since it is going on three years old, it is outdated. In addition, I made some inclusions in the original list that were a bit speculative. At this point, I believe I should include only animals that meet the following criteria:

I personally observed the animal in the field. This allows me to include animals that I was not the first to come upon or was not the one that lifted the rock to find, etc.
The animal was alive. I will not be including animals found dead on the road.
The animal was positively identified.

That last one is probably the most restrictive. It will remove a few of my previous listers, and prevent me from adding a couple more--most notably some sort of skink (probably a Broadhead) that the boys and I observed in TN last year, but not closely enough to be absolutely sure it wasn't a Five-lined sporting its "breeding colors".

However, in the interest of accuracy and honesty, I feel that adhering to these principles is best, and now present you with the updated and amended list.

REPTILES

TURTLES

Common Snapping Turtle, WI- 1980
Eastern Box Turtle, OH- 2003
Ornate Box Turtle, WI- 2005
Eastern Painted Turtle, OH- 2005
Midland Painted Turtle, WI- 1991
Eastern Spiny Softshell Turtle, WI- 1991

LIZARDS

Green Anole, FL- 1988
Northern Fence Lizard, KY- 1999
Praire Racerunner, WI- 2006

SNAKES

Lake Erie Water Snake, OH- 2007
Northern Water Snake, WI- 1995
Queen Snake, OH- 2007
Northern/Midland Brown snake, OH- 1999
Midland/Texas Brown Snake, WI- 2003
Northern Red-bellied Snake, OH- 2006
Eastern Garter Snake, WI- 1990
Maritime Garter Snake, ME- 1993
Chicago Garter Snake, WI- 1990
Plains Garter Snake, WI- 1980
Butler's Garter Snake, WI- 2003
Northern Ribbon Snake, OH- 2004
Northern Ringneck Snake, OH- 2005
Blue/Yellow-bellied Racer, WI- 2006
Smooth Green Snake, OH- 2005
Western Fox Snake, WI- 2005
Eastern Milk Snake, WI- 1991
Eastern Massasauga Rattlesnake, OH- 2005

AMPHIBIANS

SALAMANDERS

Red-spotted Newt, OH- 2007
Spotted Dusky Salamander, TN- 2007
Northern Dusky Salamander, OH- 2005
Imitator Salamander, TN- 2007
Ambystomatid hybrid, OH- 2005
Spotted Salamander, OH- 2007
Smallmouth Salamander, OH- 2006
Eastern Tiger Salamander, WI- 1991
Redback Salamander, OH- 2005
Jordan's Salamander, TN- 2007
Southern Redback Salamander, TN- 2007
Northern Two-lined Salamander, OH- 2007
Southern Two-lined Salamander, OH- 2005
Long-tailed Salamander, TN- 2007
Blue-Ridge Two Lined Salamander, TN- 2007
Northern Spring Salamander, OH- 2006
Blue Ridge Spring Salamander, TN- 2007

TOADS AND FROGS

American Toad, WI- 1980
Fowler's Toad, WV- 2005
Gray Treefrog, OH- 2004
Spring Peeper, OH- 2006
Western Chorus Frog, OH- 2006
Bullfrog, OH- 1997
Green Frog, OH- 2005
Wood Frog, WI - 2005
Northern Leopard Frog, WI- 1991
Pickerel Frog, WI- 1991
Blanchard's Cricket Frog, OH- 2005

Some interesting stats on the numbers above. I added 7 species or subspecies to my list in 2006 and 11 (9 of them salamanders!) in 2007, giving me a totals of 6 turtles, 3 lizards, 18 snakes, 17 salamanders, and 11 frogs/toads, or 55 herptiles. Again these numbers are modest to poor compared to those of other people who like to do what I do; this is merely the present status of a lifetime project.

Species I think I have a good chance of adding this year on outings in Ohio and South Carolina include the Eastern Fox Snake, Black Kingsnake, Eastern Kingsnake, Corn Snake, Hog-nosed Snake, Copperhead, Southern Toad, and American Alligator. I also still hope to verify continued populations of Marbled Salamanders and Four-toed Salamanders in my home Ohio County.

Wish me luck.

Valentine's Day Poem*

2008-02-14T22:06:00.005-05:00

The lovely Angela found this in her card this year:

A Valentine's Day Heart

looks nothing like the muscled pump
thumping behind skin and ribs;
instead, its pointed symmetry resembles
more an arrowhead which once, perhaps,
graced one of Cupid's mystic shafts--
even that which left his grasp a night
fifteen years ago. (He turned his back
before it struck; the arc it traced was true.)
Now, broken from its stem and drenched
in love's pure distillate, I hand it
back to you and pray your kisses soothe
this precious wound I hope will never heal.

*American Life in Poetry, formerly a regular feature at The O-Files, will not be published here until further notice. To those (few) of you who were coming here for your regular poetry fix, I apologize.

American Life in Poetry: Column 148

2008-01-28T19:22:00.000-05:00

BY TED KOOSER, U.S. POET LAUREATE, 2004-2006

I've written about the pleasures of poetry that offers us vivid scenes but which lets us draw our own conclusions about the implications of what we're being shown. The poet can steer us a little by the selection of details, but a lot of the effect of the poem is in what is not said, in what we deduce. Lee McCarthy is a California poet, and here is something seen from across the street, something quite ordinary yet packed with life.

Santa Paula

There's a woman kissing a cowboy
across the street. His eight-year-old son
watches from the bus stop bench.
She's really planting one on him,
his Stetson in danger.
It must have been some weekend.
Seeing no room in that embrace for himself,
the boy measures his future, legs
straight out in front of him.
Both hands hold onto a suitcase handle,
thin arms ready to prove themselves.

American Life in Poetry is made possible by The Poetry Foundation (www.poetryfoundation.org), publisher of Poetry magazine. It is also supported by the Department of English at the University of Nebraska-Lincoln. Poem copyright (c) 1992 by Lee McCarthy, whose most recent book of poetry is "Good Girl," Story Line Press, 2002. Reprinted from "Combing Hair with a Seashell," by Lee McCarthy, Ion Books, 1992, by permission of the author and publisher. Introduction copyright (c) 2007 by The Poetry Foundation. The introduction's author, Ted Kooser, served as United States Poet Laureate Consultant in Poetry to the Library of Congress from 2004-2006. We do not accept unsolicited manuscripts.

American Life in Poetry: Column 147

2008-01-22T19:37:00.000-05:00

BY TED KOOSER, U.S. POET LAUREATE, 2004-2006

Our earliest recollections are often imprinted in our memories because they were associated with some kind of stress. Here, in an untitled poem, the Nebraska State Poet, William Kloefkorn, brings back a difficult moment from many years before, and makes a late confession:

I stand alone at the foot
Of my father's grave,
Trembling to tell:
The door to the granary is open,
Sir,
And someone lost the bucket
To the well.

American Life in Poetry is made possible by The Poetry Foundation (www.poetryfoundation.org), publisher of Poetry magazine. It is also supported by the Department of English at the University of Nebraska-Lincoln. Poem copyright (c) 2004 by William Kloefkorn, whose most recent book of poetry is "Still Life Moving", WSC Press, 2007, illustrated with pastel paintings by Carlos Frey. Reprinted from "Alvin Turner As Farmer," Logan House, 2004, by permission of the author and publisher. Introduction copyright (c) 2007 by The Poetry Foundation. The introduction's author, Ted Kooser, served as United States Poet Laureate Consultant in Poetry to the Library of Congress from 2004-2006. We do not accept unsolicited manuscripts.

American Life in Poetry: Column 146

2008-01-10T19:39:00.000-05:00

BY TED KOOSER, U.S. POET LAUREATE, 2004-2006

Post-traumatic stress disorder is a new name for "shell shock," a term once applied only to military veterans. Here the poet Marvin Bell describes a group of these emotionally damaged soldiers, gathered together for breakfast. I'd guess that just about everybody who reads this column has known one or two men like these.

Veterans of the Seventies

His army jacket bore the white rectangle
of one who has torn off his name. He sat mute
at the round table where the trip-wire veterans
ate breakfast. They were foxhole buddies
who went stateside without leaving the war.
They had the look of men who held their breath
and now their tongues. What is to say
beyond that said by the fathers who bent lower
and lower as the war went on, spines curving
toward the ground on which sons sat sandbagged
with ammo belts enough to make fine lace
of enemy flesh and blood. Now these who survived,
who got back in cargo planes emptied at the front,
lived hiddenly in the woods behind fence wires
strung through tin cans. Better an alarm
than the constant nightmare of something moving
on its belly to make your skin crawl
with the sensory memory of foxhole living.

American Life in Poetry is made possible by The Poetry Foundation (www.poetryfoundation.org), publisher of Poetry magazine. It is also supported by the Department of English at the University of Nebraska-Lincoln. Poem copyright (c) 2007 by Marvin Bell, and reprinted from "Mars Being Red," Copper Canyon Press, 2007, by permission of the author and publisher. The poem first appeared in "Gettysburg Review," Summer, 2007. Introduction copyright (c) 2007 by The Poetry Foundation. The introduction's author, Ted Kooser, served as United States Poet Laureate Consultant in Poetry to the Library of Congress from 2004-2006. We do not accept unsolicited manuscripts.

Poetry Catchup #1

2008-01-07T18:49:00.000-05:00

Shame on me!

American Life in Poetry: Column 141

BY TED KOOSER, U.S. POET LAUREATE, 2004-2006

Life becomes more complicated every day, and each of us can control only so much of what happens. As for the rest? Poet Thomas R. Smith of Wisconsin offers some practical advice.

Trust

It's like so many other things in life
to which you must say no or yes.
So you take your car to the new mechanic.
Sometimes the best thing to do is trust.

The package left with the disreputable-looking
clerk, the check gulped by the night deposit,
the envelope passed by dozens of strangers--
all show up at their intended destinations.

The theft that could have happened doesn't.
Wind finally gets where it was going
through the snowy trees, and the river, even
when frozen, arrives at the right place.

And sometimes you sense how faithfully your life
is delivered, even though you can't read the address.

American Life in Poetry is made possible by The Poetry Foundation (www.poetryfoundation.org), publisher of Poetry magazine. It is also supported by the Department of English at the University of Nebraska-Lincoln. Poem copyright (c) 2003 by Thomas R. Smith. Reprinted from "Waking before Dawn," Thomas R. Smith, Red Dragonfly Press, 2007, by permission of the author. Introduction copyright (c) 2007 by The Poetry Foundation. The introduction's author, Ted Kooser, served as United States Poet Laureate Consultant in Poetry to the Library of Congress from 2004-2006. We do not accept unsolicited manuscripts.

Visit Column 140 here: American Life in Poetry: Column 140

Poetry Catchup #2

2008-01-07T18:33:00.000-05:00

(This out of order post brought to you by Blogger!)

American Life in Poetry: Column 145

BY TED KOOSER, U.S. POET LAUREATE, 2004-2006

If one believes television commercials, insomnia, that thief of sleep, torments humans in ever-increasing numbers. Rynn Williams, a poet working in Brooklyn, New York, tries here to identify its causes and find a suitable remedy.

Insomnia

I try tearing paper into tiny, perfect squares--
they cut my fingers. Warm milk, perhaps,
stirred counter-clockwise in a cast iron pan--
but even then there's burning at the edges,
angry foam-hiss. I've been told
to put trumpet flowers under my pillow,
I do: stamen up, the old crone said.
But the pollen stains, and there are bees,
I swear, in those long yellow chambers, echoing,
the way the house does, mocking, with its longevity--
each rib creaking and bending where I'm likely to break--

I try floating out along the long O of lone,
to where it flattens to loss, and just stay there
disconnecting the dots of my night sky
as one would take apart a house made of sticks,
carefully, last addition to first,
like sheep leaping backward into their pens.

American Life in Poetry is made possible by The Poetry Foundation (www.poetryfoundation.org), publisher of Poetry magazine. It is also supported by the Department of English at the University of Nebraska-Lincoln. Poem copyright (c) 2007 by Rynn Williams, whose most recent book of poetry is "Adonis Garage," University of Nebraska Press, 2005. Poem reprinted from "Columbia Poetry Review," no. 20, Spring 2007, by permission of Rynn Williams. Introduction copyright (c) 2007 by The Poetry Foundation. The introduction's author, Ted Kooser, served as United States Poet Laureate Consultant in Poetry to the Library of Congress from 2004-2006. We do not accept unsolicited manuscripts.

American Life in Poetry: Column 144

BY TED KOOSER, U.S. POET LAUREATE, 2004-2006

I'd guess you've heard it said that the reason we laugh when somebody slips on a banana peel is that we're happy that it didn't happen to us. That kind of happiness may be shameful, but many of us have known it. In the following poem, the California poet, Jackson Wheeler, tells us of a similar experience.

How Good Fortune Surprises Us

I was hauling freight
out of the Carolinas
up to the Cumberland Plateau
when, in Tennessee, I saw
from the freeway, at 2 am
a house ablaze.

Water from the firehoses arced
into luminescent rainbows.

The only sound, the dull roar of my truck
passing. I found myself strangely happy.
It was misfortune on that cold night
falling on someone's house,
but not mine
not mine.

American Life in Poetry is made possible by The Poetry Foundation (www.poetryfoundation.org), publisher of Poetry magazine. It is also supported by the Department of English at the University of Nebraska-Lincoln. Poem copyright (c) 2007, by Jackson Wheeler, whose most recent book of poetry is "A Near Country," Solo Press, 1999. Reprinted from "Rivendell," Issue Four, Native Genius, Spring 2007 by permission of the author. Introduction copyright (c) 2007 by The Poetry Foundation. The introduction's author, Ted Kooser, served as United States Poet Laureate Consultant in Poetry to the Library of Congress from 2004-2006. We do not accept unsolicited manuscripts.

American Life in Poetry: Column 143

BY TED KOOSER, U.S. POET LAUREATE, 2004-2006

Here is Arizona poet Steve Orlen's lovely tribute to the great opera singer, Maria Callas. Most of us never saw her perform, or even knew what she looked like, but many of us listened to her on the radio or on our parents' record players, perhaps in a parlor like the one in this poem.

In the House of the Voice of Maria Callas

In the house of the voice of Maria Callas
We hear the baby's cries, and the after-supper
Rattle of silverware, and three clocks ticking
To different tunes, and ripe plums
Sleeping in their chipped bowl, and traffic sounds
Dissecting the avenues outside. We hear, like water
Pouring over time itself, the pure distillate arias
Of the numerous pampered queens who have reigned,
And the working girls who have suffered
The envious knives, and the breathless brides
With their horned helmets who have fallen in love
And gone crazy or fallen in love and died
On the grand stage at their appointed moments--
Who will sing of them now? Maria Callas is dead,
Although the full lips and the slanting eyes
And flared nostrils of her voice resurrect
Dramas we are able to imagine in this parlor
On evenings like this one, adding some color,
Adding some order. Of whom it was said:
She could imagine almost anything and give voice to it.

American Life in Poetry is made possible by The Poetry Foundation (www.poetryfoundation.org), publisher of Poetry magazine. It is also supported by the Department of English at the University of Nebraska-Lincoln. Poem copyright (c) 2001 by Steve Orlen. Reprinted from "The Elephant's Child: New & Selected Poems 1978-2005," by Steve Orlen, published by Ausable Press, 2006, by permission of the author. First published in The Gettysburg Review. Introduction copyright (c) 2007 by The Poetry Foundation. The introduction's author, Ted Kooser, served as United States Poet Laureate Consultant in Poetry to the Library of Congress from 2004-2006. We do not accept unsolicited manuscripts.

Biblical Poetry: Entry 1

2007-12-03T09:51:00.001-05:00

For a few weeks now, I have been carrying the American Life In Poetry column, courtesy of the Library of Congress and the Poetry Foundation. In addition to this feature, I would also like to occassionally bring you snippets of poetry from the most important book in my life, The Bible.

At the outset, I would like to say a couple of things, the most important being that this is more than just poetry, it is the Word of God. Yes, please enjoy the writing, but also, listen to what He is saying. Secondly, this will not be a regular feature; rather I will bring these to you as I come across them in my own reading, or, as is the case with this entry, as a result of our pastor bringing a passage to my attention.

This first entry is very timely. During the Christmas season, we often criticize the crass commercialism that seems to run rampant around this and other holidays. But Haggai, the Old Testament prophet, points out that very often, love of material things is part of who we are, sometimes one of our deepest desires. He uses simple contrasting couplets to highlight the futility of this mentality.

Consider Your Ways

You have sown much,
and bring in little;

You eat,
but do not have enough;

You drink,
but you are not filled with drink;

You clothe yourselves,
but no one is warm;

And he who earns wages,
Earns wages to put into a bag with holes.

Consider your ways.

~from Haggai 1:5-7 (NKJV)

Packers 27, Cowboys 37

2007-11-30T09:41:00.000-05:00

Talk about deja-vu! If anyone forgot what it was like to watch Packers-Cowboys mid 90's, last night was a convenient trip back in time.

Thanks to a brother-in-law who has NFL Network I was able to watch the game in its entirety. It really was not as depressing as you might think; the Pack appeared to have a chance up until the final 5 minutes.

In case you missed it, here are some thoughts from a person who stayed up for the whole thing.

--The crew of referees that officiated last night's game might want to brush up on certain parts of the NFL Rulebook, particularly as pertains to faceguarding, forward progress, excessive celebration, and incidental contact.

--The Packers' primary pass rush strategy was a bit mystifying. It consisted mainly of each rusher finding an unnoccupied offensive lineman and engaging him.

Consequently, Tony Romo's play looked a bit less like the stellar performance it actually was, and more like a dude sitting in his living room easy chair tossing cold ones to his friends.

--Dallas Offensive Coordinator Jason Garrett's post game notes undoubtedly contained something akin to the following: "Al Harris cannot consistently cover Terrell Owens . . . Collins and Bush cannot consistently cover anyone . . . Send thank you card and flowers to Atari Bigby."

--Heavy consumption of hot wings, pizza, Doritos and carbonated beverages after 8:30 pm will result in frequent wakefulness accompanied by some of the most regrettable intestinal distress ever experienced by man.

--Despite the fact defensive players from every team in the NFL fall into the fetal position nearly every time they see him carrying the ball, the Packers somehow managed to "limit" Marion Barber to 81 yards and no scores. To me Barber was the single biggest threat to a Green Bay victory coming into this game. Go figure.

--Let's all be honest. Does anyone really think that Favre getting hurt did anything but help the Packers? It was obvious Brett was having one of those games where trying harder only led to worse play, and had he not been sidelined, Green Bay may not have scored more than 10 points.

Aaron Rodgers acquitted himself nicely, forever ending (we can only pray) the era of Doug Pederson style backup QBs in Green Bay. He ably manned the helm of the Packer offense for three scoring drives, passed for 201 yds and a TD (with nary a interception or fumble), as well as running for positive yardage including a couple first downs.

--Under his football uniform, Jason Witten wears blue leotards, a red cape, and has a capital "S" emblazoned on his chest. He is completely justified in doing so.

After Terrell Owens decided to bat the football to a defender in the endzone rather than secure it for his (yawn) 15th TD of the season, Romo threw to Witten almost exclusively. Most of the Packer defense compares in size to Witten as Bryant Gumbel compares to Chris Collinsworth.

(These latter are the NFL Network's Thursday Game play-by-play announcer and color-man respectively. When shown onscreen together, Collinsworth is typically seated, and Gumbel is standing on a barstool. Collinsworth is still an inch or two taller. Perhaps not coincidentally, I was struck more than once that Gumbel is the no-brainer choice for any Kermit the Frog voice work that might presently be available.)

--What head coach in the NFL truly believes that a 6 foot plus quarterback cannot fall forward for two inches and pick up a must-have first down? Besides Mike McCarthy, I mean.

--A case could be made that Green Bay kicker Mason Crosby was the Packer's most valuable player last night. Not only did he nail two long field goals (47 and 52 yds) , but he was responsible for making the stop on two (!) kickoff returns that might have gone for touchdowns otherwise.

Additionaly, he laid down a perfect onside kick that Green Bay recovered. An unfortunate failure by Packers' #20 to control his own body (his arm grazed the ball before it went 10 yds) resulted in a rekick. At that point the element of suprise was lost, and Crosby had to boot it on down the field.

--Apparently A. J. Hawk and Aaron Rodgers are actively campaigning to return NFL players' physical appearences to the Jack Lambert/Lynn Dickey era. I cannot decide if this is better or worse than the current dreadlock trend.

Hey folks, thanks for reading, and stop by again-- I'll be here all week.

American Life in Poetry: Column 139

2007-11-28T09:59:00.000-05:00

BY TED KOOSER, U.S. POET LAUREATE, 2004-2006

Man's best friend is, of course, woman's best friend, too. The Illinois poet, Bruce Guernsey, offers us this snapshot of a mutually agreed upon dependency that leads to a domestic communion.

The Lady and the Tramp

As my mother's memory dims
she's losing her sense of smell
and can't remember the toast
blackening the kitchen with smoke
or sniff how nasty the breath of the dog
that follows her yet from room to room,
unable, himself, to hear his own bark.

It's thus they get around,
the wheezing old hound stone deaf
baying like a smoke alarm
for his amnesiac mistress whose back
from petting him is bent forever
as they shuffle towards the flaming toaster
and split the cindered crisp that's left.

American Life in Poetry is made possible by The Poetry Foundation (http://www.poetryfoundation.org/), publisher of Poetry magazine. It is also supported by the Department of English at the University of Nebraska-Lincoln. Poem copyright (c) 2007 by Bruce Guernsey, whose newest book, "New England Primer," published by Cherry Grove Collections (WordTech Communications) is due out in 2008. Poem reprinted from "Spoon River Poetry Review", Vol. XXVI, no. 2, by permission of the author. Introduction copyright (c) 2007 by The Poetry Foundation. The introduction's author, Ted Kooser, served as United States Poet Laureate Consultant in Poetry to the Library of Congress from 2004-2006. We do not accept unsolicited manuscripts.

American Life in Poetry: Column 138

2007-11-20T08:22:00.000-05:00

BY TED KOOSER, U.S. POET LAUREATE, 2004-2006

You've surely heard it said that the old ought to move over to make room for the young. But in the best of all possible worlds, people who love their work should be able to do it as long as they wish. Those forced to retire, well, they're a sorry lot. Here the Chicago poet, Deborah Cummins, shows a man trying to adjust to life after work.

At a Certain Age

He sits beside his wife who takes the wheel.
Clutching coupons, he wanders the aisles
of Stop & Save. There's no place he must be,
no clock to punch. Sure,
there are bass in the lake, a balsa model
in the garage, the par-three back nine.
But it's not the same.
Time the enemy then, the enemy now.

As he points the remote at the screen
or pauses at the window, staring
into the neighbor's fence but not really seeing it,
he listens to his wife in the kitchen, more amazed
than ever--how women seem to know
what to do. How, with their cycles and timers,
their rolling boils and three-minute eggs,
they wait for something to start. Or stop.

American Life in Poetry is made possible by The Poetry Foundation (www.poetryfoundation.org), publisher of Poetry magazine. It is also supported by the Department of English at the University of Nebraska-Lincoln. Poem copyright (c) 2007 by Deborah Cummins, and reprinted by permission of the author. Deborah Cummins' most recent book of poetry is "Counting the Waves," WordTech Communications, 2007. Introduction copyright (c) 2007 by The Poetry Foundation. The introduction's author, Ted Kooser, served as United States Poet Laureate Consultant in Poetry to the Library of Congress from 2004-2006. We do not accept unsolicited manuscripts.

Obama '08!

2007-11-16T12:34:00.000-05:00

Ok, I watched the Democratic presidential primary debate last night, and gained instant respect for Sen. Barack Obama (IL). Not because of his policies and views, although if pressed, I might have to concede that his policy on immigration makes more sense to me than that of President Bush. Actually enforce existing laws? What a novel concept!

But what I found to be more impressive was that he actually-- in fairly stark contrast to the rest of the field-- stated what he believed! Most of what I heard from the rest, Clinton and Edwards especially, could have been rephrased as, "Vote for me because the policies of George W. Bush are dismal failures."

While many pundits have referred to his admittedly verbose answer to the question on drivers licenses for illegal immigrants as "fumbling" or "rambling", Obama did what we long for most candidates to do; he answered and then went on to identify what he believed was the underlying issue. Thinking past the sound-byte? What another unusual quality.

Additionally, most post-debate commentaters I have heard say he avoided answering yea or nay. Well perhaps that's how it sounded to anyone who didn't really care to hear anything other than a one word answer, but, in fact, he clearly stated at the beginning of his little speech that he supported such licenses and believed they were in the interest of public safety.

Oddly, many analysts failed to note that only Clinton and Biden gave a yes/no answer to this question (Kucinich was the real non-respondant here). It almost seemed to me that this segment of the debate was little more than an opportunity for Hillary to get on the record with her new position on this topic.

The last thing I wanted to point out was the way Obama would brook no spin-doctoring from Clinton regarding his tax proposals. Obama supports raising the cap (currently $97,500) on the amount of income that is subject to the Social Security tax. Clinton said that such an increase would hurt "middle class" Americans. Perhaps an income pushing $100K is middle class in New York, Clinton's home district, but Obama quickly and correctly pointed out that only 6% of Americans make over $97,500. That can hardly be considered middle class.

Now, as I said, I don't necessarily agree with Obama on alot, but the point he raised also serves as the basis of tax-cut mentality. It is simply impossible to cut taxes for much of the middle class. The fact is that there are lots of middle class families who pay no federal income tax at all. So when you hear tax-raisers holler that tax cuts primarily favor the rich, they are right. It is the rich people who are the primary tax payers in the United states. While Obama wants to tax them more, at least he is honest about the numbers as he proposes it.

So, now that you know my thoughts on the man who should be the next Democratic nominee for president, let me give a quick rundown on the rest of the runners. This is going to be, of course, entirely subjective, and perhaps even occassionally tongue-in-cheek.

Sen. Joseph Biden (DE): I really didn't get to focus on much that he had to say since I was so distracted by the fact that, while his forehead is hideously wrinkled, the portion of his face below eyebrow level is totally tight. A little too tight. Anti-wrinkle tape, Joe? He also appears to think he and his little judiciary committe are pretty hot stuff: "I've presided over more Supreme Court Justices than any one in history." Justices or nominees? I have no doubt that anyone currently on an appointment approval committe has presided over more nominees than any of their predecessors, what with the rate at which qualified candidates are capriciously turned away.

Gov. Bill Richardson (NM): This guy is so earnest it hurts. He really wants to help. He means it! I don't doubt his sincerity, but alot of his proposals are, well, unrealistically idealistic. While the same could be said about me sometimes, I don't get on as big a stage as poor Bill and confess my hopes to a nation who is never going to give me the first chance to pursue them. Someone buy this dreamer a blankie and a cup of hot chocolate; next November will find him out in the cold.

Rep. Dennis Kucinich (OH): Last night was my first exposure to this strange and, apparently, very angry little man. I don't know how tall Hillary is, but she towers over him, and his demeanor and manner of speaking makes her look and sound as pleasant as your Aunt Martha. He objects to and is offended by Wolf Blitzer referring to someone as an illegal immigrant. He says people cannot be illegal. Really, that is what people are trying to say? I know Dennis was born in Cleveland, and he was probably educated in the public schools there as well. How else can you explain the fact that he doesn't seem to understand that when a person is referred to by a word describing how they arrived in this country (like, say, immigrant) that a modifying word describing the legality of that means of arrival is not totally innapropriate.

Although I do have to give ol' Dennis props-- anyone who can make a former trial lawer squirm on stage deserves it. Especially when that trial lawyer is John Edwards.

Sen. Hillary Clinton (NY): It may just be I am prejudiced against anyone with this last name, but last night seemed like more puff and spin and saying the bare minimum about what the latest polls indicate that people want to hear. Please, please, PLEASE do not let this lady be the nominee.

Sen. Chris Dodd (CT): From what I could gather he disagrees with George Bush, like, alot, and sounds as if he would have a lovely singing voice. Perhaps better suited for American Idol, Baby Boomer Edition?

Former Sen. John Edwards (SC): This guy, to me, is the single scariest candidate on stage. He comes across like a total fake. A trial lawyer who made his multi-millions by suing big business, he apparently learned along the way that it is entirely appropriate to use the tragic death of your teen-aged son for political purposes-- not heard that story? Ask John Kerry about it. I'm just amazed he was able to go the whole night without his wife stepping in to protect him.

Politics and poetry dominating the O-files. Kinda weird. Fear not folks. There is herp related stuff coming soon!